Headline: Radical Girl Scouts Out To Destroy American Family Values

Full Story

"(Bob) Morris (Indiana) alleged that the Girl Scouts of America and the World Association of Girl Guides and Girl Scouts "have entered into a close strategic affiliation with Planned Parenthood," which he claimed is trying to "sexualiz(e) young girls through the Girl Scouts."

Even worse, he wrote, only three of the 50 role models promoted by the Girl Scouts have even "a briefly-mentioned religious background." "All the rest are feminists, lesbians, or Communists..." And there's more, read the full story before your next meal!

VS-UC editorial:

Jeez, where do I begin? How did this person get elected without a clause requiring that he continue medication or suffer a recall? Are these the wishes and desires of his constituents? 

In a related story, the representative from the colorfully named sister city Dodge Reason, Indiana, Independent Party rep Sly Douche (the French pronunciation) stood firm behind his brother representative, confirming that the Boy Scout organization is, in fact, run by aliens, "the kind from another world", he said, adding quickly that he did not want to offend traditional good 'ole "foreign invaders" from places like Mexico and, say, Guam. His quote: "them there alien Boy Scout leaders are, by definition, godless since they were not created by the Big Guy himself, who is not a fan of mixing cultures, lesbians and commies - and yes, that's in the O-riginal bible." 

He went on to say that he and Bob Morris will form a partnership against the Girl and Boy Scouts, using the catchphrase "But That Ain't Right!" and hope that  other "But Buddies" join them in their righteous cause. 

That's Representative Bob Morris, a Republican representing Fort Wayne.

---