Judy Tenuta
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Judy Tenuta
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Oak Park, Illinois, USA
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Nov 07 1956 -
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Juuuudy!
Juuuuuuuudy! Oh Giver-Goddess sublime, oh Healer of
Hermaphrodites...isn't it time for some new material? Like we have TIME
for a recorded re-tread of your first three albums...dream on, Klingon.
You read real purty from your bible, "The Power of Judyism," and the
Goddess' sound men practically go Postal to make sure you have
appropriate effects. But our foreheads have been buffed to a blinding
sheen already, and the fat jokes are about as fresh as Blowseanne's
panty shields.
Let's go back in time....OOHHHH, KYOKOOOO....remember when you were the only Virgin Flower on the block? (It could happen!) You converted us to Judyism by doling out your barbs and slams with religious fervor, and we ached to recieve the gift of your pre-chewed gum. Now your audience can shout out your pungent punchlines before you get a chance, as if they already possess you. (NO!) We may be little more than Hillfiger heifers and Gap-going gonads for wanting something new and trendy, but we love you as much as our Ernest Borgnine beauty treatments.
We love you, Defiant Diva, and your musical interludes here are head and shoulders above the nose of that sycophant Streisand. But you run the risk of self-parody, sweet Geisha Girl, and even the most burly butt-pirate has heard this schtick more often than he's been stuck. To spread the word of Judyism we must bring you forward in time...the Darva Congers and larva-eaters of Survivor demand to be skewered on the spit of your sarcasm. There are boy bands to be butchered and Kathy Lee is still at large...we need the Goddess' guidance to put these pigs in their place.
We await your response to these and other triumphs of tastelessness, oh Empress of Elvis Impersonators.
Let's go back in time....OOHHHH, KYOKOOOO....remember when you were the only Virgin Flower on the block? (It could happen!) You converted us to Judyism by doling out your barbs and slams with religious fervor, and we ached to recieve the gift of your pre-chewed gum. Now your audience can shout out your pungent punchlines before you get a chance, as if they already possess you. (NO!) We may be little more than Hillfiger heifers and Gap-going gonads for wanting something new and trendy, but we love you as much as our Ernest Borgnine beauty treatments.
We love you, Defiant Diva, and your musical interludes here are head and shoulders above the nose of that sycophant Streisand. But you run the risk of self-parody, sweet Geisha Girl, and even the most burly butt-pirate has heard this schtick more often than he's been stuck. To spread the word of Judyism we must bring you forward in time...the Darva Congers and larva-eaters of Survivor demand to be skewered on the spit of your sarcasm. There are boy bands to be butchered and Kathy Lee is still at large...we need the Goddess' guidance to put these pigs in their place.
We await your response to these and other triumphs of tastelessness, oh Empress of Elvis Impersonators.
01 Introduction
02 Incarnations
03 Nuns & Father Shanky
04 Song Love Slave
05 Astral Projecting
06 Letters To The Goddess
07 Dogma on Comedy
08 Song Why Are You Living
09 Purgatory Dating
10 Pig Club
11 I'm O.K... Your a Fat Cow Weight Loss Plan
12 More Letters To The Goddess
13 Diets
14 Goddessize
15 Letter 56 Yr. Old
16 Where Not To Mate
17 Pet Peeves
18 Sports
19 How To Harness Cosmic Power Through Your Crotch
20 Predictions and Initiation
21 Song Party In Your Pants
02 Incarnations
03 Nuns & Father Shanky
04 Song Love Slave
05 Astral Projecting
06 Letters To The Goddess
07 Dogma on Comedy
08 Song Why Are You Living
09 Purgatory Dating
10 Pig Club
11 I'm O.K... Your a Fat Cow Weight Loss Plan
12 More Letters To The Goddess
13 Diets
14 Goddessize
15 Letter 56 Yr. Old
16 Where Not To Mate
17 Pet Peeves
18 Sports
19 How To Harness Cosmic Power Through Your Crotch
20 Predictions and Initiation
21 Song Party In Your Pants
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Stand-up
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ENJOY!
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Hers other material on this blog is "tagged" at the bottom of this post
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1 comments on "Judy Tenuta - Power of Judyism 1998"
A pretty complete (read: lengthy) comedy audio book of Judy's "religion" tome. Like her or hate her (I tend to the former), she did create her own bizarre universe.
And what exactly are "candy pants"?
Ed
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