Status Report: New Computer

Funny story for you:

Got the new computer about 10 days ago, custom built with a TV tuner card capable of processing digital cable TV (with a Cablecard) through Media Center.

Originally, being the seasoned skeptic that I am, I ordered the PC on the condition that it actually had to work as advertised. The Vice President of the company called me at home to assure me "this is what we do." He was very nice.

The PC was running within 30 minutes, but the tuner card could not be detected, even though a hand-signed letter which came with the computer assured me it was "thoroughly tested." Their website even has a nifty status feature that told me when the PC was in its stringent testing phase. That was nice.

So I sent in an email to tech support, let them chew on that for a day, then called the manufacturer, waited in the hold queue for about an hour (a message told me my position in the queue every few minutes.) That was nice.

The rest of the story went something like this:

Re-install Windows. Check the tuner. Re-install drivers. Check the tuner. Install a new tuner, shipped free (that was nice), re-install windows. Re-install windows. No luck. I re-installed windows a total of six times. Call the tuner manufacturer, no help. All told, I spoke to a half dozen help desk folks who had me re-install windows (did I mention that?), reinstall drivers and run diagnostic apps like each time, by magic, it would work. All told, I waited on the phone as short as one hour and as long as 2 hours and 45 minutes, about 8 times.

BONUS: I got smart after the second windows install and stopped re-installing my apps and moving data from backups. DOWNSIDE: no email, no MS Office, etc. and no tools to support a website. GOOD NEWS: I used LOGMEIN (free) to do my duty by connecting to my old PC, in remote control mode, which was still chugging along. I provide help to a half dozen relatives by using LOGMEIN and finally got to use it to help myself!

Murphy (the guy with his own Law) woke up, heard about my situation, recognized an opportunity to be a sadistic bastard and created a fresh hell for me, demanding that I send important faxes, finish a few chapters of my book, make a critical website update, and provide remote support to relatives. Murphy smiled, knowing that he created several situations that never happen at once, validating his shitty law, and keeping his legacy alive. Prick.

Now listen, I have the patience of a vulture flying figure eights over a dying dingo. And I see the humor in every situation. But this one is g-e-t-t-i-n-g... o-n...m-y...l-a-s-t...N-E-R-V-E.

So tonight the support folks are going to call me with: A-a sure fire solution or B-an RMA to return the PC. But so far they have not been calling me back as promised. But they have been... let's say it together... very nice!
For you Canadians, you can read about Captain Eddie Murphy here. And for our fans in the midwest, tomorrow I will post Murphy's Law in all its glory. I'll ring a cowbell when it's posted, so you feel at home.
{Private thought balloon} Didn't I insult the Canadians and mid-westerners in a previous post? Gotta research that. Wouldn't want to leave out the western folks. And how about the rest of the world? I'm sure I can think of something funny to say about Mexico, or South America. France and England are just toooo easy. OK, that settles it, I  should keep the insults to this continent.